Day 4: Fixing shear clamps to shear panels

After working all day on a Monday, we were both eager to take the next step in our boatbuilding project.
Okay, that was a line for the benefit of any PBS/HGTV/DIY/etc producers wandering around the World Wide Web in search of the next great do-it-yourself-handy-dandy-marketing-to-the-baby-boomer-crowd program.
In the REAL world (not to be confused with the TV version), I sure didn't feel like working on the stupid thing after slaving away all day in the ivied halls of academia - well, half a day, at least, of researching and rewriting syllabi and curriculi and various cruddi.
The Dyslexic Left-Handed Carpenter, however, was hot to get on it after his 10-hour day of braving the **storm that greets him daily in his office. I deferred to his greater enthusiasm, being the noble Nubb that I am.
The shear clamps had cured despite cool temps and were ready to be epoxied to the shear panels. This seemingly simple task turned somewhat nightmarish when we discovered the bargain 2-inch C clamps we had purchased in bulk turned out to be roughly 1 and 13/16 inch C clamps (approximation due to our inability to properly measure the device while simultaneously pitching it down the driveway). I pondered how such a disaster could be avoided if the USA would just join the rest of the Metric World ~ global Metricity, what a concept! Meanwhile the Dyslexic LH Carpenter pondered an alternative method to clamp 17 feet of board every 6 to 8 inches with a suddenly depleted supply of clamps. Much to our mutual shock, we resisted the urge to jump in the truck and go buy replacement clamps!
After a bit of sanding to get things nice and smooth, we inspected the shear panels and chose our outside faces (the ones with the least globs and gouges). We monkeyed around for some time trying to arrive at the perfect way to lay out, epoxy, and clamp the shear *clamps and panels.
*Now, for those of you who have never built a kayak, canoe, or hybrid kayak-canoe: are you getting confused about this clamp business? Well, guess what! Clamp is both a verb and a noun and there is a part of the boat called shear clamps that are 2 eighteen foot lengths of 3/4 X 3/4 inch wood of some kind. So you have to attach the shear clamps to the shear panels (which eventually become the upper sides of your boat). The attaching is accomplished by applying epoxy and then clamping the shear clamps to the shear panels with C clamps every 6 inches all along the length of the shear panels (about 17 feet or so). Thus you clamp the clamps. Confusing, isn't it?*
Anyway - we accomplished the goal and left it to cure for 24 hours. We were inside eating supper by 7:30. We were dozing in our chairs by 8:30. We were in bed by 9. We rock.
~posted by the Nubbed One